A relationship is a very confidential matter of concern and you have to be consciously aware while dating a person you love. When you are in a dating relationship with a man you love then you have to be consciously aware of with whom you are heading, why you are heading, and what really matters to you in a relationship.
You have to have clarity regarding the traits or qualities you desire to experience in a man and the kind of relationship you desire to be in from the very start of your dating relationship. The man you are dating should be aware of your desires and relationship goals from the beginning. It doesn't mean that you must force him to be in a committed relationship within a few dates rather you need to have certain clarity regarding the deadlines for talking regarding commitment being together. You need to invest your quality time to know him from the core of his being and you must follow your emotional intelligence and intuition intelligence during the manifestation process.
There is no fixed scientific or expert-based opinion on time period or deadlines for how should you wait for commitment, it's all about how you feel emotionally and intuitively being with that person. Never force him for a committed relationship within few dates rather take some time and know him to his soul level first. When you force him for a commitment after a few dates then he might leave you instantly. You have to express your burning desires for commitment once you feel that you have reached a point where you can't have more patience. You must express yourself in a wise and mature way regarding the purpose of a dating relationship, your core values, traits, or qualities you desire to experience in your ideal man and ideal kind of relationship life. Actually having a romantic night and candle night dinner every weekend might not be the appropriate way to measure the quality of your relationship life. You have to be very conscious regarding the red flags you experience in your dating relationship from the very beginning.
When you start to feel insecure, emotionally empty, lonely, and if you feel suspicious about his opinion on commitment then observe the pattern of his excuses. When you start to realize that he is not showing any signs for commitment after several months or years of dating and if you start to feel suspicious about his similar patterns of excuses then this a huge wake up call for you. There are always some valid reasons behind delaying in commitment and you can't force a man you love for a commitment as per your terms and conditions. Whenever you invest your precious time, energy, and everything for a man you love being loyal then it's obvious to expect the same level of loyalty and commitment from him as well. It is emotionally very devastating to continue an undefined type of relationship with an unfixed man for so long because it disturbs all the key areas of your life.
Your mind gets occupied by only one man who means everything to you and you become clueless when he keeps delaying and extending every time for years and years when you humbly request him for a committed relationship. Your heart gets shattered into a million pieces when a man you love is not sharing about you with their family, friends, or on social media for so long and always keeps you in a brain fog or brain confusion by giving you fake excuses. You might be wondering that why a man you love unconditionally can deny you for a commitment even though you are 100% committed and loyal to him. There are countless reasons for denying and extending the time period for a commitment and you have to be consciously aware of the red flags before you get into the sea of emotional storms.
Here are some probable reasons that can help to know why he is delaying commitment for so long..
1. He Isn't Over His Ex Yet:-
He might have convinced you with full confidence and with an eye contact that he is over his Ex but in reality, he is not over his Ex emotionally when you find him delaying for commitment for too long. He continues his emotional game behind your back with his Ex by being emotionally occupied and inspecting his Ex in every way possible regarding her every move. Actually, he doesn't want to lose you till he is unable to get his Ex or get over his Ex. He will try his best to not get caught emotionally and pretend to be happy being with you since you have become a woman like "Friends With Benefits" for him. He prefers an option while working on his Ex and he is with you for his self-centered motives. He is happy with you whenever he is with you and having romantic nights because he is able to bridge his emotional gap as per his terms and conditions.
2. He Might Have Experienced A Devastating Breakup Or Divorce In The Past:-
When a man you love unconditionally being loyal and if he is afraid to commit for a too long period then he might have experienced a very emotionally devastating breakup or divorce in his past relationship. He might not have able to get over his past relationship issues which are blocking him to commit but at the same time, he loves to be with you and have quality time, romance including sex as well. The fear of being getting hurt again might be his compelling reason to delay commitment and he might not be serious about commitment too since he is getting everything from you to medicate his emotional issues. He might be perceiving you as his emotional therapist since you are medicating his emotional wound for so long.
3. He Might Not Be Clear About The Purpose Of Being In A Relationship With You.
He might not have any clarity regarding the traits or qualities he is looking for in a woman and he might not be clear about the core purpose of this relationship. Since he has no clarity and purpose in this relationship, so he is not that serious about being in a committed relationship. He just loves your company, emotional bond of connection, and having a physical relationship with you even though he can't commit till the right time arrives and that right time arrives very rarely in a real life. He might be in a dating relationship with you for his self-centered motives only and you might not be aware of the red flags for so long.
4. He Might Not Be Mature Enough To Take Relationship Seriously.
Every man is not the same and maturity is the key element for committing in a dating relationship. He might not be mature enough to take this relationship as a serious matter of concern and he might be taking it casually without knowing the purpose of this relationship. He might have some attention-grabbing qualities or traits which has been confusing you regarding his immaturity for so long. He is not aware of his own immaturity too since he is enjoying your company as he gets everything from you without any extra effort. He might be taking this dating relationship with you in a very casual way rather than being too serious.
5. He Might Have An Abusive Childhood.
When a person is treated in an abusive way in their childhood phase then their belief system is programmed in a negative way which takes a long duration of time to reprogram it in a positive way. The negative belief system generates negative traits like fear and insecurities which paralyze their logical intelligence, emotional intelligence, and intuitive intelligence. He might have low self-esteem, low self- worth and he might lack his own self-identity which might be stopping him to commit for too long. He might be using his weakness as his weapon and you might not be aware of these red flags for so long.
6. He Might Be Into Another Woman Too.
He might be in an affair with other women as well at the same time which might be his hidden core reason for not committing and delaying without any valid convincing reason. A man with such traits is a qualified professional to play with many women at once without getting caught for so long. He is consciously aware of his every action and you can't be able to catch him if you ignore your emotional intelligence and intuitive intelligence while getting red flags being with him. He won't commit and he can't leave you at the same time since he is getting everything he wants by keeping you as an option.
7. He Might Not Be Mentally, Emotionally, & Financially Stable Enough To Be In A Committed Relationship:-
A committed relationship is a very confidential matter of concern which demands a positive harmony among the key areas of life to excel a happy and vibrant relationship life for the lifetime. He might not be mentally, emotionally, and financially prepared or stable enough to be in a committed relationship which might be his core reason for extending the time for commitment. He might be too much focused on his dream projects or goals and he might not be in a situation to be in a committed relationship with you. He is able to get everything from you despite his own personal issues which are like having bread with butter without making any extra effort.
8. He Might Be Addicted To Romance And Sex Only.
He might be pretending to love you for the sake of having quality time, romance, and sex by keeping you as an option. He might have intentionally targeted you to use you for his hidden purpose and keeping you in a brain confusion without leaving any clues or red flags for getting caught. He can't be serious for a committed relationship since he has got countless women to satisfy his needs for romance and sex. When a man is addicted to romance and sex only then they have no intention to be in a committed relationship.
9. He Might Be With You For The Fear of Being Single For So Long.
He might have experienced a series of breakup or divorce and had been single for so long, and he might have found you as a perfect emotional pill to bridge his emotional gap. He is able to cover his own insecurities and since he himself is not fixed emotionally which might be the core reason to delay for commitment with the same pattern of excuses.
How to deal with his commitment phobia when you start to feel emotionally devastated and stuck by waiting for his commitment for so long?
You are a human being with emotions, desires, and dreams, and you might have a dream of being in a loving, stable relationship with someone who can love you, treasure you, and prioritize you for who you are. You are not his lifetime project to wait for him forever to make up his mind and decide about your acceptance in his life. Whatever be the probable commitment issues in a man you love, you have to utilize your logical intelligence, emotional intelligence, and intuitive intelligence wisely while experiencing the red flags. Never allow an unfixed person to use their personal issues as a weapon for so long as being in an undefined type of relationship. It doesn't matter whatever be his issues, all it matters is how you feel emotionally and intuitively being with him.
You need to be consciously wise enough to analyze the pattern of excuses and follow your emotional intelligence and intuitive guidance system to make a confidential decision regarding your existing relationship issues. You can't fix his issues nor he can fix your issues if you continue the same pattern of an undefined relationship for so long. You must sit together for a confidential type of conversation and you need to humbly request him with love for working on each other's issues by having some time and space till the existing issues get fixed. When you allow him some time and space to fix his issues to get fixed then you need to work on yourself too since nobody is perfect. Some unexpected truths will come to the surface with this approach.
If he truly loves you from the core of his being and if he is able to fix his internal issues prioritizing you for a committed relationship then he will definitely be into your life sooner or later. You can't just expect a miracle to happen, being with an unfixed person and ignoring all the red flags knowingly for several years. Never engage yourself in a dating relationship with someone else while working on each other's internal issues. Besides this, you will be able to work on yourself too to discover the best version of yourself and you will be able to read him through his vibes, patterns of excuses, and red flags easily. Actually, when you continue your relationship with an unfixed man being in an undefined relationship for too long then it can create a huge blockage in the manifestation process of your ideal partner.
You need to expand your awareness regarding the working mechanism of the law of attraction because the law of attraction is the solid foundation to manifest your ideal partner. You can refer this article for more descriptive understanding regarding the action-oriented approach of the law of attraction to manifest your ideal partner How to use the law of attraction for manifesting your ideal partner or soulmate in 15 action steps?----(Highly read article on LOA). You have to practice meditation which can help to harmonize your thought, emotion, and action in a positive manner. Meditation will also help to detach you from all the thought chattering, negative energy and it will help you to spiritually connect with your eternal self which is your real self. You can make a wise decision once you are spiritually aligned with your eternal self through spiritual practice. It would be a great idea to create a vision board regarding your relationship goals and goals related to building the best version of yourself.
You must focus on your own happiness, personal well being, and do the things that make you feel happy from within. You must engage yourself with personal growth, physical growth, professional growth, and spiritual-based activities for your positive life transformations. Don't engage with him while working on yourself and harmonize all the key areas of life in a positive manner. Suppose, if he requests you to continue the same pattern of a relationship including sexual relationship while having some time and space to work on each other's issues then this is also a huge red flag. You need to change the pattern of your life to manifest the ideal partner of your relationship life. You have to detach yourself from all the negative people and associate with a like-minded positive quality of people with whom you can grow in a positive manner while working on yourself.
The hidden truth will definitely come to the surface once you detach yourself from him for a certain time period and allow him to fix his internal issues. Never show your desperateness rather believe in yourself and trust in the Universe intelligence because he will definitely be yours if he truly loves you for who you are. You can have a confidential talk with him once he is mentally and emotionally ready to talk with you regarding his internal issues being honest. When you work on yourself then it will help to read him emotionally, intuitively, and through his vibes with ease. You have to understand the fact that once you become the best version of yourself then you can be so magnetic to attract your deserving person to your vortex and that person might be him or someone else whom you deserve. You won't be worried by the outcomes once you become the best version of yourself because there is always someone one specific who is divinely sent or meant to be in your life and that person exists in the Universe.
Lastly, I would say, refer a professional relationship coach if you feel emotionally devastated and stuck in your undefined type of relationship for so long. When you give your best possible effort for your relationship to work but if he keeps delaying for commitment for several years with the same pattern of excuses then this is your wake up call and a huge red flag. You deserve a person who can reflect your soul and allow you to be your authentic self being in a committed relationship. The majority of people are waiting for a miracle to happen in their undefined type of relationship for years and years being a therapist of the unfixed man they love.